Last night I had a very strange dream where my youngest son, Garrett, had stolen
a spaceship. Chris was out of town at his parent’s house, Marshall is at college,
and Garrett is deployed overseas. I sent the family a group text explaining my
dream while I was getting ready for work. The texts kept coming as I was driving
to work and well into my first class. They asked a few questions and then Garrett
wanted to know WHY he stole the spaceship, I told him I didn’t know. And, that’s
when it really started. One of the most epic Sci-Fi nerd text showdowns. I was
going to try to condense but realized I needed to just post it as it came. Maybe,
we let the boys watch too many movies and too much tv while growing up. Test
your own nerdiness by seeing how many references you get.
a spaceship. Chris was out of town at his parent’s house, Marshall is at college,
and Garrett is deployed overseas. I sent the family a group text explaining my
dream while I was getting ready for work. The texts kept coming as I was driving
to work and well into my first class. They asked a few questions and then Garrett
wanted to know WHY he stole the spaceship, I told him I didn’t know. And, that’s
when it really started. One of the most epic Sci-Fi nerd text showdowns. I was
going to try to condense but realized I needed to just post it as it came. Maybe,
we let the boys watch too many movies and too much tv while growing up. Test
your own nerdiness by seeing how many references you get.
(Michelle is pink. Chris is grey. Marshall is blue, and Garrett is green.)
I had the STRANGEST dream last night.ight!
Is this the one with the goat and the jar of peanut butter?
No
GARRETT stole a spaceship.
Why is Garrett all caps?
You sure that was a dream?
Because I would expect you (Marshall) to steal a spaceship in my dreams but not G.
I don’t steal spaceships I’m issued them
Why did Garrett steal a spaceship?
It was from NASA and they weren’t happy. So Marshall and I were at a Camporee
trying to figure out how to get Garrett to come back. And our old Scout Master was
helping us.
That must be one hell of a hand receipt.
Where was Dad during all of this?
Dad was hunting for Garrett with the police that wanted to shoot him down, trying
to convince them to not shoot.
I really shouldn’t eat frito pie for dinner.
Was I in a spaceship too?
What did I do to necessitate my stealing a spaceship, and being targeted with shoot
on sight orders?
I have no idea why you did it, Garrett.
Was Garrett trying to rescue his best friend that he thought was dead who had
transferred his sprit into his other best friend and he needed to get to a planet created
from a device that exploded in another spaceship while it was in a nebula?
No
I had to contact my dads old war hero friend. And convince him to join our rebellion
against a tyrannical empire
Sorry no
I had to smuggle an old priest, a brilliant doctor and his mentally unstable sister off
world, and keep them out of the hands of a The Alliance military
Wait no
I need to bring my drilling buddies to blow up an asteroid
That’s not it
I needed to investigate a haunted experimental ship falling into Uranus’s atmosphere
I had to save Matt Damon from Mars
Were you trying to escape a refinery ship that was set to self destruct to try and kill a
xenomorph?
Close
I had to hitch a ride on a ship going towards Jupiter to investigate a monolith
I had to create an artificial worm hole so I could cruise around space with muppets
while being an interstellar outlaw
I needed to stow away and blow up some giant floating pyramids
Had to find Planet dad and kill him
I know. You stole an alien spacecraft from Area 51 equipped with a nuke to fly it up
to the alien mothership and infect it with a virus from your Mac laptop.
Needed to Do My Part
Service leads to citizenship. Would you like to know more?
Had to convince a large chrome robot not to destroy the earth for hurting it’s Alien
Police Officer buddy
Had to runaway from evil chrome robots with a ragtag fleet
Klaatu barada nikto
Had to help an extraterrestrial call his parents to pick him up
Had to lead a massive fleet with a command crew of prepubescents to commit
genocide against an alien bug race
Had to protect humanity’s last best hope for peace
Had to get to the invisible alien ship with a super soaker water gun so they’d quit
making crop circles.
Needed to fight the Nazis on the moon
Had to kill an alien with rocks, sharp sticks and all of these things
Had to rescue robot Spock from his crashed moon ship
Had to help an aging archaeologist find a crystal skull so ancient aliens could leave.
Had to fight a bunch of salt and pepper shakers
Uncovered a golden face on Mars. And needed to come back to reveal that’s where
we originally came from
How far back do you think we lost mom?
Stole the ship to take a bunch of commandos to a forest moon so they could get
captured and then rescued by a bunch of carnivorous teddy bears.
YOU LOSE!!
We already used Star Wars
That was ROTJ
Same series
Why is Garrett all caps?
You sure that was a dream?
Because I would expect you (Marshall) to steal a spaceship in my dreams but not G.
I don’t steal spaceships I’m issued them
Why did Garrett steal a spaceship?
It was from NASA and they weren’t happy. So Marshall and I were at a Camporee
trying to figure out how to get Garrett to come back. And our old Scout Master was
helping us.
That must be one hell of a hand receipt.
Where was Dad during all of this?
Dad was hunting for Garrett with the police that wanted to shoot him down, trying
to convince them to not shoot.
I really shouldn’t eat frito pie for dinner.
Was I in a spaceship too?
What did I do to necessitate my stealing a spaceship, and being targeted with shoot
on sight orders?
I have no idea why you did it, Garrett.
Was Garrett trying to rescue his best friend that he thought was dead who had
transferred his sprit into his other best friend and he needed to get to a planet created
from a device that exploded in another spaceship while it was in a nebula?
No
I had to contact my dads old war hero friend. And convince him to join our rebellion
against a tyrannical empire
Sorry no
I had to smuggle an old priest, a brilliant doctor and his mentally unstable sister off
world, and keep them out of the hands of a The Alliance military
Wait no
I need to bring my drilling buddies to blow up an asteroid
That’s not it
I needed to investigate a haunted experimental ship falling into Uranus’s atmosphere
I had to save Matt Damon from Mars
Were you trying to escape a refinery ship that was set to self destruct to try and kill a
xenomorph?
Close
I had to hitch a ride on a ship going towards Jupiter to investigate a monolith
I had to create an artificial worm hole so I could cruise around space with muppets
while being an interstellar outlaw
I needed to stow away and blow up some giant floating pyramids
Had to find Planet dad and kill him
I know. You stole an alien spacecraft from Area 51 equipped with a nuke to fly it up
to the alien mothership and infect it with a virus from your Mac laptop.
Needed to Do My Part
Service leads to citizenship. Would you like to know more?
Had to convince a large chrome robot not to destroy the earth for hurting it’s Alien
Police Officer buddy
Had to runaway from evil chrome robots with a ragtag fleet
Klaatu barada nikto
Had to help an extraterrestrial call his parents to pick him up
Had to lead a massive fleet with a command crew of prepubescents to commit
genocide against an alien bug race
Had to protect humanity’s last best hope for peace
Had to get to the invisible alien ship with a super soaker water gun so they’d quit
making crop circles.
Needed to fight the Nazis on the moon
Had to kill an alien with rocks, sharp sticks and all of these things
Had to rescue robot Spock from his crashed moon ship
Had to help an aging archaeologist find a crystal skull so ancient aliens could leave.
Had to fight a bunch of salt and pepper shakers
Uncovered a golden face on Mars. And needed to come back to reveal that’s where
we originally came from
How far back do you think we lost mom?
Stole the ship to take a bunch of commandos to a forest moon so they could get
captured and then rescued by a bunch of carnivorous teddy bears.
YOU LOSE!!
We already used Star Wars
That was ROTJ
Same series
Different film
The cosmic knowledge fish told you to build a jacuzzi
Mom wins
Yeah, she does
So... Garrett stole a spaceship and was being hunted by the police with shoot on
sight orders because the cosmic knowledge fish told him to build a jacuzzi. I’m
glad we figured this out.
26 different sci-if series were referenced just now
I am so proud to call you my family
Indeed - you nerds make a dad proud.
Just be glad I didn’t start using video games.
Wait
One more I promise
I had to care for a botanical garden in space with my robot friends
I was being forced to watch cheesy movies of which I have no control with different
robot friends
I was cryofrozen, and woke up as the only survivor of the ship with the hologram
of my old roommate, and the descendant of my cat
Had to stop a bald purple dude from snapping his fingers
You had to travel to Mars to loudly play your grandmother’s music so the Martians’
heads would explode.
Was transported to mars. Where the lower gravity made me basically Superman,
and I got to marry a princess
Oooh nice Red Dwarf reference there, G.
And I’m not counting that one M. We already used marvel
Thank dad
Had to save a moonbase after the moon got knocked out of orbit
Dang and a Space 1999 reference!
You guys are true nerds
Landed on a planet inhabited by sentient apes that use humans as slaves
Tried to get some macguffin metal from some blue alien hippies
Had to be the captain with my ex as the xo
Had to not panic and remember my towel
Had to return a biological sample with a small robot trash compactor to the mothership
so the fat humans could return home.
Needed to remember by past as a secret agent to create a blue sky over mars
Garrett was recruited to become a Space Ranger in uncharted space.
Need to find all the escaped androids including myself
As a future cab driver I had to help a “human” to stop the destruction of earth
I crash landed on a planet that only has night once every 20 years or so
Launched in a shuttle that went off course and returned you to Earth 500 years later
where everyone wore spandex and your best friend was a midget robot that wears a
smaller robot around his neck.
I was copied and stuffed into a replicating space probe and sent to explore the cosmos
Now we’re into books?
I’m running out of movies and TV shows
Massive Tripods started attacking earth
Aliens crashed and tried to invade China over a wall
Hahahahahaha
Fwip
...
...
...
...ugh
lol
The sound design in that movie was hilarious
A plant told me to feed it
I traveled back in time to fight a robot and conceive my friend
Had to cast multiple copies of myself throughout time and space to guide and help
my bestie
Had to not get eaten by cloned dinosaurs
Had to stop London from eating other cities
Was constantly meeting my time traveler wife in the wrong order
We already used that one
Technically you’ve done Who once. And I’ve done it twice
But have you? If you’re time traveling, do we really know who was first?
I keep forgetting something that’s right in front of me
My arch rival became a chick constantly spying on me
I made friends with lesbian, Watson, and lesbian lizard Holmes
I keep making inventions that fail because of a platypus in a hat
LOL
Got shot by my wife, while my wife was watching with my best friend. Who was
pregnant with my wife.
You’re still just doing dr who
Got touched by a statue and had was transported years back in time
Still Dr Who
I once named myself “The War Doctor” when “The Medic” would have been so much cooler
My spaceship once got a human host and kissed me
Some kid in a gas mask kept asking if I was it’s mummy
There’s a giant radioactive dinosaur stomping on Tokyo
Future human space ship broke reality on the bottom of the ocean floor
Giant Robots fighting giant aliens
Taking out spaceships with obsolete naval units
A Nimitz carrier tracking back to Pearl Harbor
Those darn aliens are stealing our water
A giant arena set up below the Antarctic that allows aliens to hunt other aliens
Alien refugees
Aliens coming to give us a language that makes use see the future
Kids building spaceships out of carnival rides
To save your high school history project so you can grow up, be in a band,
and play music that changes the world.
Travel to an alien world stuck in the 50s
Invade an alien world and infect it with oxygen
Hit by a meteor and turned into a giant
Get your mother and father to go to prom together
Fix an air filter with a sock
Evil dr tries to kill the family robot
Marshall was that a Jimmy Neutron reference with the carnival rides?
Yes it was
Yes
Cool
Yeah, she does
So... Garrett stole a spaceship and was being hunted by the police with shoot on
sight orders because the cosmic knowledge fish told him to build a jacuzzi. I’m
glad we figured this out.
26 different sci-if series were referenced just now
I am so proud to call you my family
Indeed - you nerds make a dad proud.
Just be glad I didn’t start using video games.
Wait
One more I promise
I had to care for a botanical garden in space with my robot friends
I was being forced to watch cheesy movies of which I have no control with different
robot friends
I was cryofrozen, and woke up as the only survivor of the ship with the hologram
of my old roommate, and the descendant of my cat
Had to stop a bald purple dude from snapping his fingers
You had to travel to Mars to loudly play your grandmother’s music so the Martians’
heads would explode.
Was transported to mars. Where the lower gravity made me basically Superman,
and I got to marry a princess
Oooh nice Red Dwarf reference there, G.
And I’m not counting that one M. We already used marvel
Thank dad
Had to save a moonbase after the moon got knocked out of orbit
Dang and a Space 1999 reference!
You guys are true nerds
Landed on a planet inhabited by sentient apes that use humans as slaves
Tried to get some macguffin metal from some blue alien hippies
Had to be the captain with my ex as the xo
Had to not panic and remember my towel
Had to return a biological sample with a small robot trash compactor to the mothership
so the fat humans could return home.
Needed to remember by past as a secret agent to create a blue sky over mars
Garrett was recruited to become a Space Ranger in uncharted space.
Need to find all the escaped androids including myself
As a future cab driver I had to help a “human” to stop the destruction of earth
I crash landed on a planet that only has night once every 20 years or so
Launched in a shuttle that went off course and returned you to Earth 500 years later
where everyone wore spandex and your best friend was a midget robot that wears a
smaller robot around his neck.
I was copied and stuffed into a replicating space probe and sent to explore the cosmos
Now we’re into books?
I’m running out of movies and TV shows
Massive Tripods started attacking earth
Aliens crashed and tried to invade China over a wall
Hahahahahaha
Fwip
...
...
...
...ugh
lol
The sound design in that movie was hilarious
A plant told me to feed it
I traveled back in time to fight a robot and conceive my friend
Had to cast multiple copies of myself throughout time and space to guide and help
my bestie
Had to not get eaten by cloned dinosaurs
Had to stop London from eating other cities
Was constantly meeting my time traveler wife in the wrong order
We already used that one
Technically you’ve done Who once. And I’ve done it twice
But have you? If you’re time traveling, do we really know who was first?
I keep forgetting something that’s right in front of me
My arch rival became a chick constantly spying on me
I made friends with lesbian, Watson, and lesbian lizard Holmes
I keep making inventions that fail because of a platypus in a hat
LOL
Got shot by my wife, while my wife was watching with my best friend. Who was
pregnant with my wife.
You’re still just doing dr who
Got touched by a statue and had was transported years back in time
Still Dr Who
I once named myself “The War Doctor” when “The Medic” would have been so much cooler
My spaceship once got a human host and kissed me
Some kid in a gas mask kept asking if I was it’s mummy
There’s a giant radioactive dinosaur stomping on Tokyo
Future human space ship broke reality on the bottom of the ocean floor
Giant Robots fighting giant aliens
Taking out spaceships with obsolete naval units
A Nimitz carrier tracking back to Pearl Harbor
Those darn aliens are stealing our water
A giant arena set up below the Antarctic that allows aliens to hunt other aliens
Alien refugees
Aliens coming to give us a language that makes use see the future
Kids building spaceships out of carnival rides
To save your high school history project so you can grow up, be in a band,
and play music that changes the world.
Travel to an alien world stuck in the 50s
Invade an alien world and infect it with oxygen
Hit by a meteor and turned into a giant
Get your mother and father to go to prom together
Fix an air filter with a sock
Evil dr tries to kill the family robot
Marshall was that a Jimmy Neutron reference with the carnival rides?
Yes it was
Yes
Cool
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